Late arrivals all announced crescendo in the lounge Candles lit and places set, gentle strain of string quartet Toss the salad, fry the chips, chef seals it with a kiss Sipping an aperitif the socialites take their seats

Mrs White is always there to polish up the silverware She's poured the wine, God bless her But where's the professor? The professor

A shrug from Reverend Green, in the library, nothing seen Books are lying there untouched, leather bound and layered with dust But now it's time to eat and all the guests take up their seats All but one who's on the list, it seems he'll give this one a miss

Appetiser on the plates, hear the Reverend saying grace The party's come together Without the Professor The professor

The Colonel sinks another gin and sees the widow hide a grin He's trying to impress her But where's the Professor? The professor

Moonlit windows, fading hopes, tie back the curtain ropes The heiress shuffles in her chair, scarlet ribbons in her hair After dinner, playing cards, vicar winning at charades Older gents with drooping heads, time for slipping off to bed

Guests are drifting off to sleep, under cover counting sheep But what's that on the dresser? And where's the Professor? The professor

Open eyes and wide awake, what is yours that's left to take And is there a confessor? Do you feel the pressure? Who'll be your successor? Is it the Professor? The professor