Fun prompt! I took the notion of advertising one of those (nameless) cheap airlines....

You want the best life has to offer To be treated like royalty Then go somewhere else You’re not welcome here We only offer cheap with extras

You want to sit together? That will cost extra You want to choose your own seat? That will cost extra

We’ll print your boarding pass But guess what, that will cost extra You want a case in the hold? That will cost extra

You want a take-on bag? That will cost extra You want to get to your destination? We’ll get you there, or pretty close

We’ll get your there and we’ll get you down Now what else could you want You think you’re better than us? It was your choice to fly, You think you’re better than us? You could have taken the bus So enjoy, and prepare for the extras

(c) words and music G Todd 2026