FAWM: "Thirteen Weevil Lane"

Thirteen Weevil Lane

6 days ago by @andrea

There is no demo for this song.

Liner Notes

I have been wanting to write a haunted house story for at least a year. I think this is 90% done.

Update: I changed the bridge today. I hope it is better.

I am happy to hear any ideas for improvement.

I am thinking something dark for music. Metal would be a good fit.

Lyrics

The grand house on the hill stood vacant For a pittance it was now mine I bought my own funeral too When I signed on the dotted line

On the first night I lay wide awake As the old house settled its bones An incessant cacophony Of ominous creaks, moans and groans

Thirteen Weevil Lane Strives to drive a man insane Thirteen Weevil Lane Where life crumbles and decays Thirteen Weevil Lane It’s written in the name We evil plain as day

Three weeks in and my head starts to spin And I know I’ve made a mistake Ghosts roam the halls, blood drips from the walls It’s time to make my escape

Pack up my suitcase wallet and keys And make a quick break for the door A bump, a thump, and a tumble I lay sprawled on the hardwood floors

Thirteen Weevil Lane Strives to drive a man insane Thirteen Weevil Lane Where life crumbles and decays Thirteen Weevil Lane It’s written in the name We evil plain as day

My spirit takes flight Drawn towards a bright light My body remains Another victim of Weevil Lane

Thirteen Weevil Lane Strives to drive a man insane Thirteen Weevil Lane Where life crumbles and decays Thirteen Weevil Lane It’s written in the name We evil plain as day

Comments

@williamjames 1d

That is a sinister story. I like how the thing that actually brought our protagonist down was a tumble not a an actual ghost. Maybe they never saw anything spooky and was just hallucinating causing the fatal fleeing. Thirteen weevil lane is a great name for the place. This could work as murder folk or indeed a dark country song.

@andrea 8h

Thanks for checking out more of my lyrics. My intention in the story was that the ghosts did cause the death. They gave a little nudge which caused the tumble, but I love the hear other interpretations. A little mystery is always good. I was thinking some kind of dark or heavy music. I like that idea of murder folk or dark country ;)

@birdsofpraise 1d

A classic spooky tale! The name Weevil Lane is kind of Dickensian, it's such an evocative name that I'm not sure the "evil" part even needs to be specifically pointed out - though the way you did do that was fun, "plain as day" gives a sense that whatever is haunting the house is proud of its malice. The mysterious death of the narrator leaves a lot up to the imagination, as it should be with all good horror stories

@andrea 1d

Thanks so much for your thoughtful comments. Maybe it would be a good idea to rethink explaining the true meaning of 'Weevil lane'. I will think about this :)

@johnstaples 3d

Oooo, this gave me goosebumps! I love, Love, LOVE this story and these lyrics! I liked the title a lot, I mean, how could you not like "Thirteen Weevil Lane"? But then you took us by the hand and showed us, with a simple space, how this became "Thirteen We evil Lane"! AWESOME SAUCE! Then you walk us quickly through this narrator's experience and ultimate demise as his "spirit takes flight" and I am reeling! Excellent set of lyrics!

@andrea 2d

Wow, I can't thank you enough for your very positive comments. This makes me feel very happy!

@musicsongwriter 3d

Very creative writing, Andrea. I don't think you need any improvements. I hope to hear the demo.

@andrea 2d

Thank you so much, Nadia ❤️

@kc_ 3d

Nice!! Fun tune, hope it finds some great music!! This will be killer!!

@andrea 3d

Thanks, KC! One day it will be killer -lol :)

@jerrypettit 3d

I like it! I hope somebody sets it to music. I'm struggling to get my own songs done, or I'd give it a try (I do love a spooky story). Great job! ❤️

@andrea 3d

Thank Jerry. I'm so glad you like it. I have to stop on your page and listen to your songs :)

@greengrassgirl 4d

I absolutely love, “Thirteen Weevil Lane.” Andrea, you are SO creative! I hope you find just the right partner for this one.

@andrea 3d

Thank you, Patty. Youn always make me smile with your comments :)

@val 4d

"Thirteen Weevil Lane" Very clever! Such a twisted, dark tale. Very spooky and horrific!

@andrea 4d

Thank you, val. I am glad you found it clever :)

@mikeb 4d

When I saw the name, I thought 'oh good, the bug theme like my song'!)! Lots of great lines and rhymes in this one!

@andrea 4d

I love your bug theme. I used the bug name for something very different. Thanks for your thoughtful comments.

@kahlo2013 5d

Ohhhh…. This is deliciously dark and spooky! I love the address and the vivid sensory images! Fabulous haunted house song!

@andrea 4d

You are so kind, Liz. Thank you for your compliments!

@richaaaay 5d

Wow…That’s hella creative. Good story telling. The chorus bit provides a cool twist. Great writing I’d say. Haunting well done…

@andrea 4d

Thank you for your thoughtful comments, Rich. I have to do at least one ghost story each FAWM.

@nadine 5d

This turned out great! "I bought my own funeral too, When I signed on the dotted line" is my favourite line. Would be great for some 80s goth or metal stuff

@andrea 5d

Thanks Nadine! I would love some metal for these lyrics ;)

@paul_pedersen 6d

We haven't done anything together since Average Joe in 2013. Is it time to do something again? I'm hearing music for this in my head and wouldn't mind giving this a try. Whatcha think?

@andrea 5d

My first FAWM was 2022. I guess I was thinking metal would be a good fit for these lyrics. What do you have in mind?

@paul_pedersen 5d

Pardon the misprint. Average Joe was in 2023.

If there's one thing I'm not, it's metal. I was thinking of a gentler approach in a minor key to match the atmosphere of the story. But, if you envision metal, I'll graciously bow out. It's day 14 and I have my 14 songs done so I'm just carrying on for fun.

@andrea 5d

I feel that the dark lyrics might call for a dark treatment. I will consider your proposed option for a few days, if that's ok. Thank you

@paul_pedersen 5d

I'm not in a rush, so take your time to consider your options.

@andrea 3d

Thank you. Congrats on making 14 so quickly! That is amazing.

@paul_pedersen 3d

Normally I don't do skirmishes but this year there's a series of them being hosted by a songwriting friend, so I felt I should support her efforts. That helped get three songs written and recorded in an hour each, pushing the total up a bit.

@andygetch 6d

I'm not much for this sort of topic but wow, this is quite a tale. I hope it gets to where it wants to be.

@andrea 5d

Thanks for checking out my story. I like a dark song sometimes ;)

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Thirteen Weevil Lane

Liner Notes

Lyrics

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