This song really came together in a nice way. My most favorite part is "heavy load", where the words come quick one on the other. I can't explain it, it's just such a satisfying twist.

Ooh. This is my kind of thing. Although this is awesome as-is. I would love a full on rock version. Like early Deep Purple.

Stick with your own singing. Always! I have to go to huge comping efforts with my instrument playing. Still much more rewarding than getting machine help.

I like the key changes a lot. and once you've learnt your own song.... you'll not need Frankenstein.

The composition of this song is frikkin brilliant!! I can't even conceive of those key changes that work so perfectly. That melody is haunting and beautiful. The lyrics are deeply impactful and sad. The line "I am afraid to end it, but I'm terrified to stay" is so powerful and frightening. You've captured the tortured soul of a lost person so well. It's astonishing you can project that kind of reality not having experienced it. You are the most amazing storyteller!! This song is musically fascinating, the composition works so well as it flows from one set of progressions into a totally different one and yet harmony is skillfully maintained. I was mesmerized and am each time I listen. Awesome job!! You are having an extraordinary FAWM my friend... this is a masterpiece of americana!!

Powerful piece of writing. Love the chorus. I predominantly only read the lyrics as I find the messaging easier to focus on. I also don't have enough knowledge to comment on the music, so I will leave that to others. Really enjoyed reading this. Thanks for your insights. Cheers

Harmonically really interesting, I can see how it would be difficult to sing. For a demo you've got something that works pretty well.

i wouldnt want to hear any voice on this but yours. and i listened closely but couldnt find any point at which your voice faltered. its all good so i hope you keep it as it is, even if you do an alternate version with a different vocal. its interesting how snippets of lyrics taken down in a notebook at different times can coalesce into a coherent song. i have often written songs that way and it usually results in something more compelling than a straight narrative.

This gives me a real Bowie vibe. I think it’s the chord progression and turn around into the chorus. The melody and the lyrics are great, love the vocal and the fade . Great stuff.

Very cool composition. It is interesting and the melody flows over it brilliantly. Great lyrics as well. your vocals to my ears sound great but that is a challenging vocal for sure, I think you pull it off.

Always good to push yourself sometimes! sounds a pretty complex approach! Your vocal sounds pretty good to my ear and very different, i can certainly hear the move between not obvious chords, but you carry it off pretty well. A good listen

Sad times we live in where we have to explain what is and isn't AI. People are so suspicious of anything that can't be done at a beach side bar - lol! (nod to one of my songs). I like that line "I have no address - I'm living in my head."

Surprise chord at the bottom of the cracker jack box. Collectibles.. Ha. Its cool. It weaves and just when it resolves it changes again only to sort of resolve. I think the deft melodic skills you posess keep it from running off the rails 😎

I really enjoyed the different keys; kind of like a palate-cleanser in between courses of a fancy meal. I’m also glad to hear that I am not the only one who dices and splices projects. Sometimes mine seem more like Lego constructions by the time I get something shareable. Yours sounded great!

I love this, John! It's something I'd have fun singing (not in this key though lol). I actually really like your vocals on this one! The lyrics are soooo good and I really especially love the chorus.

I like the descending chord structure in the verse as a pointer to the doom of the narrator. Catchy chorus too. As always a great song, John. I think the vocal is fine!