FAWM: "Exercisin' the Ghost"

Exercisin' the Ghost

5 days ago by @wylddandelyon

Exercisin' the Ghost

wylddandelyon

00:00

Liner Notes

These lyrics started from a skirmish ("first") and a street name challenge in 2024. The lyrics were too long and the scansion nearly non-existent (yes, you could indeed say the lyrics were too flabby); the references to street names were one of the first things I edited away when I returned to it this month. But I loved the story I came up with, and always intended to return to it and whip it into shape when I got the chance.

This is also for the Finish It challenge. Thanks for getting me to actually trim it and reshape it and give it a tune.

This is played on the first guitar I bought from Peter Cox, which has now been pretty much permanently tuned to drop C. (Drop D tuned down one step.) I do love the timbre of this guitar when it's tuned down, and I love drop D tuning, so combining the two was a very happy experiment the first time I tried it.

#folk #filk #ghost #acousticonetake #funny #singersongwriter

Lyrics

Exercisin’ the Ghost By Deirdre M. Murphy

D G A posh gym called, said please we need help right away A D We’ve got a fat ghost, that lard has gotta go G D Bill collectors call me daily, so I quickly said ok A D Pay me my fee up front, and I’ll banish that foul ghoul G D She recoiled in horror. “No, that just wouldn’t do! A D He flirts with the old ladies, we need him to stay-- G D But he’s bad for our image, it’s the fat that must go A D But no diet or pilates will help a dead man

Now, my business is exORcising, not making ghosts trim There’s no ritual in the books to make shades look good That trainer saw my scowl, said “I’ll triple your fee!” I would’ve said no, but I remembered my bills

I could consider it a challenge, it sure would be a first He had more ectoplasm than a thrift store has junk It was clear that no old ritual could ever do the trick I’d have to write a new one for this strange ecto-suction

I returned at midnight, drew the spell on the floor When he was safely trapped I said I’ll set you free soon And wheeled in my hoover, sucked that plasm away Now he’s trim as a treat, but oh so much more sweet

He has plenty of muscle, and more charm than a cat Now he smiles and poses while those old women sweat The trainers are happy; they call when the flab comes back As for me, well at least I paid off all those bills

Comments

@musicsongwriter 3d

Interesting story and delivery. There is symbolism and wisdom in it. Oh, you might like to take 1 out in your date unless you meant 20216 :)

@wylddandelyon 3d

Ah, another person who notices stray typos on the fly. Thank you, I've fixed it in my computer.

@musicsongwriter 3d

@tiggy 4d

Excellent that you manged the editing, resulted in a song I really like. But what happened to the hoover? Do you need another song?

@wylddandelyon 4d

In the original draft, the song ended with the exorcist looking for ways to market the surplus ectoplasm, but I decided the song was long enough as is. Though if enough people ask about it, I may add a verse, or at least a coda...