Song #12 from “Yuge, the Musical”, words and music are by Mike Delaney (http://www.mikedelaney.org/default.asp). The Libretto for the musical as it stands now is here: http://www.mikedelaney.org/yuge.html My YouTube channel and Facebook page are @FolkMikeDelaney.

This musical is a re-telling of Charles Dickens’ Christmas Carol. The main character is President Yuge, and the rest of the characters are his staff, family, and acquaintances. The musical was written at the end of 2025 and the beginning of 2026.

The songs in the musical were performed at the Catbird Café virtual Open Mike, hosted by Stephen Martin and Kathe Donlan. The Catbird Open Mike is sponsored by the New England Wildlife Center (www.newildlife.org).

Song 12: Welcome to the Gates of Hell, sung by the People of the United States (Bad Ending) from "Yuge - the Musical"

Narrator: In the bad ending, Air Force Yuge, the old, poorly-maintained jet gifted to Yuge by Quatar, crashes into the Yuge Ocean, just offshore of Cape Yuge, and Yuge never makes it to Yuge Island. Rather, he goes straight to the Gates of Hell where the Citizens of the US render Yuge’s final judgment.

Welcome to the Gates of Hell It’s no surprise that you’re here We, the people of the US Have all come out to jeer

You did whatever you liked For years you’ve put us down It was totally disgusting In life, you knew no bounds.

You pardoned your rich friends Your tariffs taxed us to the hilt You cancelled many vaccines Your ugly ballroom got built

But this is the end of your road How do you like that sulfurous smell? And, I hope you like it hot Welcome to the Gates of Hell

Chorus: Welcome to the Gates of Hell We’re glad you finally fell We think you’ll fit in well Welcome to the Gates of Hell

We think you’ll fit right in Hang out with the very worst Cheaters, murderers, and rapists The wicked and the cursed

Jeffrey, Adolf, and Genghis Harvey,… well, right after he dies Maybe even Jack the Ripper Vlad the Impaler, and that cannibal guy

Chorus

Bridge: We expect you’ll do well in Hell Getting praise from the baddest guys They’ll give you their adulation And even give you a swell Hell-prize

You will make your mark Hell will get a new brand Hell will get a new name When you change the name to Yuge-Land

Chorus: Welcome to the Gates of Yuge We welcome every schmuck and kluge Every cheat and every scrooge Welcome to the Gates of Yuge

Tag: You’ll be right at home Behind the Gates of Yuge

Narrator: And there you have it. From a twice elected President, to a dead failure. And it you want to go back in time and see the Happy Ending, here it is…