OK so an odd title - its a football song - its a world cup this year don't you know - I was talking to a non league fan friend of mine and he said there were only 360 in the ground - and I thought, well that's every angle covered at least. So I invented a fictional team - nicknamed "the Mustards" - and there you go. UTM

All dressed up Red yellow black on my scarf Away trip We'll all have a really good laugh A tour bus Arranged by a mate in the know Confectious An afternoon spent on the snow

Pub before lunch That gaffer's a womble The left back's a pawn Fodder for Gonzo

"Only 360. there in the ground Is that what lost you the game?" "You have to look at this all in the round We had every angle framed"

All messed up We had no control of the ball And Westrop Did nothing to mention at all 10 million? He plays like a pregnant baboon This window We can't let him go too soon

Pub after match The gaffer's on Sky now He's just an excuse The owner's a burnout.