This is from a tarotcard challenge prompt. The face of the card read "You are the best thing to ever happen to you." and the back side read "Go easy on yourself, buy your own drink." I did this in a talking style, like Hank Williams as Luke the Drifter, or the Rev. Billy C Wirtz's Room 309 (find it if you can.)
BEST THING TO EVER HAPPEN TO YOU
tarotcard prompt, approximate lyrics.
Hey stranger, how ya doing? What ya drinking there? I'm enjoying the exact same thing! Yeah, I just stopped in here to rest myself, you know, relax and have a drink or two, get away from the haters and the complainers. Just get myself together. You know what I'm saying, friend? I think you do.
I can see you like to laugh along, you're a damn good listener, too. You know the haters are always gonna be gunning for a guy like you, you know what I'm saying? Coming after a guy who's confident, smart, good looking, a regular Joe. I can tell just by looking at you. Yeah, the haters, they're always coming after a guy like you, a guy like me.
But let me tell you something, pal, and I don't want you to forget it. "You are the best thing that ever happened to you." And keep that in mind. Yeah, we have a good laugh about that, can't we.
Well, hey, you're such a damn good listener, let me buy you a drink. Hey, Barkeep, how about a couple of more over here? For me and my pal.
(Barkeep)--Hang it up Champ, you've been talking to the mirror for the last ten minutes.