Edit: Thanks so much to @ekunyi for making a demo! Now I can tell more clearly which lines I need to fix after FAWM.
I saw a Globe and Mail article in January on this and it's been trying to be a song every since. If didn't work from Romeo's perspective so I had to change the POV.
If you get interested, see the Wikipedia article on Sehuencas Water Frog, https://www.globalwildlife.org/romeo/ or https://twitter.com/romeothefrog or https://www4.match.com/partner/profil...
Possibly not safe to read while drinking hot liquids.
Now maybe my brain will let me move on to other
My Name is NOT Juliet
No, you can’t pronounce my name
But it’s sure not Juliet
I’m a mad, angry sweaty frog
And Romeo I’ve never met
But he’s right across the room
In his big glass terrarium
Preparing, he thinks, to mate with me
Damn that vain amphibian
And now he’s singing:
Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match
Find me a frog, catch me a catch
Night after night in the dark I'm alone
So find me a frog of my own.
A whole ten year’s he’s been awaiting
To make tadpoles that are Sehuencas
His video on match.com page had failed
Thought he was the last in the Americas
That frog crowd-funded a search for me!
I was the object of an expedition
Snatched me from my swamp in Bolivia
Didn’t come here of my own volition
And now I'm singing:
Hello, old moron, whoever you are
I hope you lie down and croak
All of my curses go with you tonight
I had a frog of my own
2700 followers he has on Twitter
But I’m the last hope of the species?
What does a lab frog have to do
To appeal to the authorities?
I just won’t mate with Romeo
If he’s the last frog on earth
But I cannot get back to my swamp
I’m forever torn from the land of my birth
Spoken: Oh, no. Quarantine’s over. They’re taking me to him. Forced marriage. Aaah! Help! Ribbit! Ribbit (ritard).