While sex obviously plays a major part in our lives, I do think the Freudians take it too far by saying EVERYTHING is connected with sex. In this account of recent dreams (and one I had as a kid) I challenge the Freudians (in George Formby-esque style) to find a sexual interpretation of these dreams.
(C) Last week as I lay (G) sleeping in my (C) bed
An ad(F)venture was happening in my (C) head.
Some (F) tigers had escaped from the (C) zoo
We (D) locked the doors so they could not get (G) through.
But (C) somehow one got (G) into my (C) school
And I (F) feared I'd have to fight it in a (C) duel
I could (D) only move light things with my (G) mind
So (D) to a dismal fate I was re(G)signed.
But my (C) fear improved my (G) teleki(C)nesis
And I (F) triumphed over that example of the (C) species.
The (F) kids I teach were suitably im(C)pressed
"We (D) thought you were uncool!" they all con(G)fessed.
They (C) carried me in (G) triumph from the (C) class
My (F) colleagues looking on now quite a(C)ghast.
We (D) stepped outside and we were in deep (G) space
And (D) I awoke with a great smile on my (G) face.
Ex(C)plain (G) that one Doctor (C) Freud
A (F) connection to sex is null and (C) void.
It's the (F) human imagination on ster(C)oids.
Ex(G)plain that one Doctor (C) Freud.
(C) Next night I met a (G) brilliant cosmo(C)naut
Whose (F) months in space gave her time for (C) thought.
(F) Looking down on Earth from up in (C) space
She'd had an (D) idea that could save the human (G) race.
But (C) when she finally (G) spoke at the U.N.
The (F) audience were ninety percent (C) men
No (D) countries were convinced of her great (G) plan.
Ex(D)cept, of course, for France and Kazakh(G)stan.
(C) As a kid I had this (G) reoccurring (C) dream
And I (F) often wondered what it might (C) mean.
I was (F) in a void trying to get to a green (C) door
Be(D)hind it there was what I'm looking (G) for.
As (C) I approached (G) it would zoom a(C)way
I felt (F) trapped in a slow motion re(C)play.
In my (D) head I'd hear a slowly chiming (G) gong
And I (D) swear I'd never heard that famous (G) song.