So I went to the name prompts from Twitter FAWM and I found this guy, He deserves a song, I thought. Or maybe he doesn't. Also fits the Week One challenge.
Edmund Trafford was a nasty, cruel man
Born in the 16th century (1526!)
He went around arresting Catholic priests for sport
He was distantly related to the Queen.
Oh, Edmund Trafford , didn’t you want to be a nice guy?
Sit under your vine and fig tree
No, you were born to be a jerk
Edmund, born to be a jerk
He entered the English Parliament
He served exactly one year (1572!)
Then he was the Sherriff of Lancashire
Where he began his notorious career
He arrested Father Baxter, Father Williamson and Hatton
Then he went after Father Worthington
Didn’t find him, so he went to another house
And stole 500 pounds.
They called him an inhuman wretch
An utterly barbarous man!
Unrighteous, lamentable to behold
A human garbage can.
They buried him under a church
In Manchester so he’d be forgotten (1590!)
He gave the English Armada a paltry 100 pounds
So they wouldn’t think he was totally rotten!
(chorus twice to end)